Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Obamass: Christmas, Obama Style

Help celebrate a holiday with balls

Wow, it's that time of year again and I've been feeling like something is missing.  After a lot of contemplation and spinning in circles until I was dizzy with inspiration, I figured out just what that was. While I don't have all the details worked out,  I do have an outline, of sorts. It's not much but with your help, it can work. It's a project we can believe in.

With the arrival of the messiah (lower case m) should we not make adjustments to reflect the magnificence of the moment?  Now I'm not as clean and articulate as the chosen one, so don't expect too much but what I suggest is, that we celebrate his birthday on December 25th of each year.  Come on, that other guy has had it for over 2000 years, isn't it about time we shared?

Since there's doubt that Obama was even born in this country -his grandmother said she was there when he was born in Kenya (which is a lot closer to Bethlehem than Hawaii) - then it stands to reason that we wouldn't be all that sure of the date either.  His mother wasn't a virgin but she was a radical 60's liberal.  That's a lot better in many circles. The coincidences are uncanny.

I humbly submit a new name for that date.  In his honor, we should now and forevermore refer to December 25th as Obamass (emphasis on the second syllable).  It would still be a time of great giving as the deadline for filling taxes would now fall on the same day.

Other ideas keeping with the spirit of the season might include:

All gifts great and small would be taxed.  A windfall food tax would be incurred for any excessive feasting activities.  Carbon Footprint fines would be doubled for those traveling outside of prescribed boundaries during this time of celebration. Similar to fingerprints, Carbon Footprinting would be used to ID perps. The old adage that 'it's the thought that counts', would be taken to mean that you have considered purchasing a gift and, of course, would be taxed according by a percentage of your last tax return, on a upwardly sliding scale.

All of this gift revenue would go directly to the needy -and some of it to the poor.

I know there's so much more we can do but I've run out of ideas. 

Please help by adding suggestions as to how to make the first Obamass the standard by which all others will be judged.  I look forward to your input. Together, we can make a difference.

I encourage bloggers to use their forums to promote this blessed event.

Thank you and Merry Obamass!

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Snigglefrits said...

I think I'll quit celebrating...geesh.

Les James said...

Fine Scrooge, I hope you get a lump of coal...Whoa! That's not going to happen, you might burn it!

Mr. Shizzo said...

That's enough to turn me into a 60's Obamass Tree Hugger.

Merry Obamass to you!