Monday, December 8, 2008

Hillary Bolt!

[Radio Ad is played in a deep and dramatic male voice]

It's 3 a.m. The kids are asleep. The phone rings. It's a national emergency. Who do you want answering the phone?"

[pause]

"Yes. Hillary Clinton. Hillary Clinton for Secretary of State.



At a press conference, reporters question Hillary Clinton about the radio ad

"But, Hillary. I thought you wanted to be President when you ran that ad."

Hillary winks at the reporter and says in a game show voice.

"Gotcha!"

Hillary continues

"I fooled all of you. The entire time I ran for President, I was secretly running for Secretary of State. I'm a winner! Yes! I'm a big, big winner!"

Hillary starts to "raise the roof" with both hands up. Her hips begin to shuffle in rhythmic celebration.

"Uh, huh. Uh, huh. That's right. That's right."

Photographers are taking pictures of her. The reporters have dropped jaws. One reporter speaks up.

"Hillary. I am certain you were running for President when you ran that ad. And you lost the Democratic nomination. You are a big loser. That's what you are."

Hillary still rolling her hips and now singing.

"I'll travel the world, the seven seas. And guess who will be paying for my airfare and in-flight caviar."

Hillary points to the crowd of reporters in front of her.

"It's you. It's you tax payers, baby. C'mon. That's right. And I fooled you all the entire time. You all thought I was running for President, but that wasn't it at all."

Hillary smiles and waves.

"And all those five-star hotels around the world. All the fine cultural tours. All the international cuisine. That's the life of the Secretary of State. I'm the winner. I'm the Champion!"

A reporter bursts out loudly.

"Hillary, where are you going to go first...Disneyland?"

Hillary turns, runs a few feet, spreads her arms, glides across an imaginary finish line, and makes an Ussain Bolt pose.

"Jamaica!"

Humor-blogs is cheaper than Disneyland

3 comments:

Les James said...

Good stuff!

RT said...

HA! Funny! :)

It will be an interesting thing to watch, that's for sure.

I wonder if she'll continue to broker peace in Ireland.

Mr. Shizzo said...

She ran for President and ended up a secretary. It must be because she knows how to type.