Monday, January 4, 2010

Underwear Bomber is Gay

So, this rich kid can't get chicks. He's a total loser, and figures the best thing he can do with his life is to off himself in a packed airliner, at Christmas. Yeah, I had a lot of friends in high school and college that felt the same way. Not.

Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab isn't a name you'd give a kid if you wanted him to score with women. Still, he couldn't even get action in England, and according to the Austin Powers' flicks, they're easy. What's the deal? That's simple, he's gay, just like most terrorist are gay. What else would explain him sewing a six long inch sausage-like packet of the high explosive PETN into BVD's? He liked the feel of that package next to his, and he hoped it would go off. 

Next there was the liquid filled syringe. Play with it, and it ejects. Can you say Freudian? I'll bet he's going to be really popular in prison. And those disfiguring scars from the burns he sustained while trying to get his package off? Not to worry, his new friends won't be able to see 'em from behind.


Shimmy said...

Give Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab a year in a grave-sized underground cell in Syria and he will turn into a water-soluble fiber that contains mucilage which is beneficial for our digestive tracts.

Les James said...

Because you're a cat and a female one at that, I understand that you enjoy some rather interesting food groups. Still, I'm not sure if even your feline stomach could take that form of roughage.