Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Red-Neck Christmas Carol

Jingle Bells and Shotgun Shells

Oh, jingle bells and shotgun shells
Bagged ourselves a sleigh
Heard reindeer meat was good to eat
But Santa’s gettin’ away

Trackin’ through the brush
For the elf what dashed away
On his heals we rush
Hounds barkin’ all the way

Billy Bob and Bubba brung
Their trucks to light the night
Oh what fun to drink and sing
Our slaying song tonight

Oh, jingle bells and shotgun shells
Got ourselves a sleigh
Heard reindeer meat was nice and sweet
And Santa runnin’ away


We tree’ed ‘em like a coon
In branches way up high
Scatter guns we aimed
At the fat man in the sky

Then suddenly a shout
From my wife, my cousin May
‘bout the stuff, what she found
Back there in his sleigh

Oh, jingle bells and shotgun shells
Was goodies in that sleigh
Reindeer meat sure's a treat
But Santa slipped away

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4 comments:

Les James said...

I'd like to dedicate this to my friends Jump-Out and Snig. Two fine examples of what's right with America. Even if they do talk funny.

Snigglefrits said...

Now shugah, who you talkin' 'bout talkin' funneh? Lil' ol' me?

On a side note, if "Santa" here doesn't improve his attitude, he's gonna' find himself shot before Christmas.

Anonymous said...

Heh! Awesome!

Les James said...

RT- I picked up a guy yesterday -he was hitchhiking, get your mind out of the gutter- that could have been in this verse. I really do live out in the sticks.

FYI. The Santa in the picture is actually a manikin climbing a ladder on the outside of a building in sunny, Madrid Spain. Photoshop sure is fun. Wait 'til you see what I have for Radioactive Liberty on Monday.

Have a good weekend

Oh -RT still can't come-up with a good caption for your contest... yet.