Thursday, October 9, 2008

Job Hunting Satire

Welcome to Sure Happy It's Thursday© or S.H.I.T. Today is a dedicated to all of you who are looking for, or would like to look for different employment.

To whom it may concern,

I am writing this letter to inform you of my decision to look for another job. I will be leaving immediately as the interview process is lengthy and it will take me away from this area for some time.

You may find it odd that I would do this, since I have only been employed here for a short period of time but I believe it’s been long enough to use on my resume. In fact, many of my fellow employees are backing me in this decision.

Luckily for me the people doing these interviews are not very bright. I know from what I’ve learned here and at my previous position, that I should be able to convince them to hire me over the far more experienced candidates.

While I am gone I expect to be paid in full for the job that I won’t be doing and retain my entire benefits package and all perks related to my position here. Further I expect to be given a glowing recommendation from the heads of this establishment.

It’s comforting to know that should I somehow fail to obtain the employment that I am seeking, that my office is waiting for me here.


Senator Barack Hussein Obama

You won't find too many jobs but you will find funny listings at


RT said...

HA! Can we give him a spot at the front of the unemployment line? PLEASE!?!?!?!

Les James said...

Sorry can't do it. There's no way he should be allowed to cut in front of people who actually were working.

Chris C said...

I'm surprised the letter didn't contain a clause for a promotion no matter the outcome of his job performance.

Oh wait, that's why he's quitting.

JumpOut said...

I'd rather see him in the line ourside Hedley Lemar's office window. Of course he'd probably just escape and end up doing my favorite line from that movie:

Brother: Barrack, you shifty negro, they said you was hung!

Barrack: Yeah and dey was right!

Les James said...

I'm sure you're referring to the "fact" that folks at McCain rallies are calling for him to be strung-up.

Blazing Saddles is a wonderful example of just how far we've fallen down the PC well.

Chris C said...

They were PC back then too, just not as much.

In an interview with Mel Brooks, he revealed that the censors made him take a line out.

It was this scene:

[Lili von Schtupp has lured Bart back to her room]
Lili Von Shtupp: Is it true how zey say zat you people are... gifted?
[Lights go out, sound of zipper opening]
Lili Von Shtupp: Oh. It's twue. It's twue. It's twue, it's twue!

The next line, the one cut out was supposed to be "Madam your sucking on my arm."

True story, I'm not making it up.

JumpOut said...

Censors suck. That's a great line.